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Theoretical computer science jokes:
- If the polynomial-time hierarchy were to collapse in a forest and there were no complexity theorists around to prove it, would our programs run any faster?
- Q: how many complexity theorists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: one, who gives it to six Californians, thus reducing it to a known joke.- Q: Why did Alan Turing cross the road?
A: To see if the Turing machines rushing along it would halt for him, of course.- Kurt Gödel goes to his psychiatrist. Doctor: "What's wrong Kurt?" Gödel: "Everything seems so incomplete..."
- Old algorithmicists never die, they just { get dominated by another term / tend asymptotically to zero }.
- (heard from S. Muthukrishnan) Q: How many algorithmicists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Big-oh of one.
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| Ah, there's nothing more exciting than science. You get all the fun of sitting still, being quiet, writing down numbers, paying attention. Science has it all. - Principal Skinner |